BELIEVE: A Love Letter to the Woman Becoming

There’s a moment in a woman’s life when she begins to understand something she may have spent years trying to figure out:

You don’t need to become someone else.

You get to become more of yourself.

I think that realization comes slowly.

Through the years we spend raising families, building careers, navigating relationships, making mistakes, changing direction, starting over and discovering — sometimes quite unexpectedly — what really matters to us.

I certainly didn’t have it figured out when I was younger.

And if I’m being truthful, I still don’t.

But at this stage of my life, I’m much more comfortable with that.

Because perhaps life was never supposed to be about arriving at some perfectly finished version of ourselves.

Perhaps we’re simply meant to keep becoming.

BELIEVE has been one of my favourite words for years.

So much so that I once turned it into something of a personal philosophy:

B — Be You.
E — Evolve with Grace.
L — Love Yourself.
I — Inspire & Keep Going.
E — Embrace Lifelong Learning.
V — Veracious: Stand in Your Truth.
E — Enjoy Life’s Simple Joys.

I look at those words differently today than I might have twenty or thirty years ago.

They’ve gathered meaning along the way.

B — Be You

This sounds so simple.

But how many years do we spend wondering whether we are doing life “right”?

Whether we’re successful enough. Good enough. Accomplished enough.

Eventually, I think we begin to realize how exhausting that is.

There is enormous freedom in knowing yourself — your values, your quirks, your strengths, the things that light you up — and allowing that woman to take up her own space.

Not loudly.

Not apologetically.

Just authentically.

Wear what makes you feel like yourself. Spend time with people who make you feel like yourself. Create a life that actually feels like yours.

E — Evolve with Grace

If my life has taught me anything, it’s that very little goes exactly according to plan.

I’ve been a young mother. A single mother. A university student. A corporate professional. A consultant. A woman who walked away from a successful career. A retiree who somehow became a silversmith.

None of those versions of me had the entire map.

Each simply took the next step.

We sometimes talk about changing as though it means the person we were before somehow got it wrong.

I don’t see it that way.

Every version of you brought something with her.

You’re allowed to outgrow things.

You’re allowed to change your mind.

You’re allowed to want something completely different later in life than you wanted at 25.

That isn’t failure.

That’s living.

L — Love Yourself

This one may be the hardest.

Not just loving the polished version.

The woman who has everything under control.

But loving the woman who made mistakes. The woman who took a wrong turn. The woman who occasionally wonders what on earth she’s doing.

There is something rather lovely about reaching a stage of life when perfection becomes much less interesting.

I’m far more interested in being fully alive.

And maybe that's part of what I've been discovering as I've become more comfortable with [wearing what feels like me] — there is far less need to measure ourselves against somebody else's version of how life should look.

I — Inspire & Keep Going

I used to think inspiration came from people doing extraordinary things.

Now I notice it in much quieter places.

A woman beginning again.

Someone learning something new when she could easily have decided it was too late.

A friend navigating a difficult season with grace.

A woman choosing a life that fits her instead of one that simply looks impressive from the outside.

We rarely know who is watching us quietly thinking:

Maybe I could do that too.

You don’t have to be loud to inspire someone.

Sometimes you simply have to keep going.

E — Embrace Lifelong Learning

I love this one more with every passing year.

I took my first two-day silversmithing class without knowing where it would lead.

I simply wanted to learn.

That little decision eventually became Plein de Vie Jewelry.

I've written before about how [you don't need to see the whole path to begin]. Looking back, that first class is still one of my favourite examples.

There was no grand plan.

There was curiosity.

And sometimes that's enough.

Learning doesn’t have to turn into a business or accomplish anything at all.

Read the book.

Take the class.

Travel somewhere unfamiliar.

Ask questions.

Try something you're not very good at yet.

Curiosity keeps life interesting.

V — Veracious: Stand in Your Truth

Yes, I know.

Veracious is a slightly unusual word.

But I needed a V. 😉

And I actually love what it means: truthful and honest.

There comes a point when you realize you cannot build your life around everyone else’s expectations.

You have to know what matters to you.

For me, that meant asking some pretty big questions over the years.

How much is enough?

What do I want my days to look like?

Who do I want beside me?

What am I willing to give my time to?

Those questions eventually became part of my own exploration of [what is enough] — not simply financially, but in terms of time, priorities and the kind of life I actually wanted to live.

Those answers have shaped my life far more than any traditional definition of success ever could.

Your answers may look completely different.

That’s the point.

E — Enjoy Life’s Simple Joys

This might be my favourite of all.

Because life is mostly made up of ordinary days.

Coffee in a favourite cup.

Marley beside me.

The lake changing colour outside the window.

Flowers growing where I didn’t expect them.

Working with my hands in the studio.

Dinner with someone I love.

A beautiful piece of jewelry worn simply because you love it.

We spend so much of life waiting for the big moments.

But somewhere along the way, I realized:

the little moments are the big moments.

That idea has become increasingly important to me — noticing and celebrating the life we're already living rather than always waiting for a [special occasion to celebrate ourselves].

And Maybe That’s What BELIEVE Really Means

Not believing that everything will always work out exactly as planned.

Mine certainly hasn’t.

Not believing you have to be fearless.

And definitely not believing you need all the answers.

Maybe it’s something quieter.

Believing you can take the next step.

Believing you’re allowed to change.

Believing there are still things to learn, places to see, people to love and parts of yourself you haven’t met yet.

And believing that wherever you happen to be today is not the end of your story.

At 20, you are becoming.

At 40, you are becoming.

At 60, you are becoming.

At 80, you are becoming.

We all are.

A Little Question for You

If you were to choose just one part of BELIEVE for this season of your life, which would it be?

Be You?
Evolve with Grace?
Love Yourself?
Inspire & Keep Going?
Embrace Lifelong Learning?
Stand in Your Truth?
Enjoy Life’s Simple Joys?

Maybe you don’t need all seven today.

Maybe you just need one.

And perhaps that can be your little reminder:

You don’t have to have it all figured out.

Keep becoming. There is still so much life waiting for you.

With love,
Tammy
The maker of beautiful things